Excerpt for In Too Deep
~700 words
Quinn turned me to face him. His hands were light, yet firm on my shoulders. “I never stopped caring about you, Steph. Seeing you again was like a punch in the gut—that was how strongly you affected me. Now that I’ve got you back in my life, I don’t want to let you go.”
I wrapped my hands around his forearms, feeling the play of his muscles underneath. “I’ve always regretted how we ended. That we ended. At the time, I was so hurt, and getting past that seemed impossible. But looking back now, I can see how immature and judgmental I was. But those wounds are still there, Quinn. And you reopened them yesterday when you saw me with your son.”
“Both of us have regrets. How will we know whether we can overcome them if we don’t try?”
I broke away, moving to stand several feet away as my resolve built. “Here’s the thing, Quinn. I’m not interested in being some dirty secret in your life that you don’t want to tell anyone about—especially Liam. That’s how you made me feel yesterday.”
“I know. And I’d never be ashamed to show you off. You’re the most amazing woman in any room you enter. But I’m not sure you understand that Liam is a huge priority for me.”
I whirled around, irritation rising like bile. “Of course I understand that! Do you think I’m some heartless bitch who wants to see your son hurt? You’re exactly the kind of father I thought you’d be. I’ve only been around the two of you for a short period, but it’s obvious in his face he worships you. But I refuse to get more involved with you if you won’t let me into your life! Your whole life, Quinn.”
“That’s what I’m trying to do here!”
“By only seeing me when your son isn’t around? What kind of message does that send to him?”
Quinn raked a hand through his hair. “He’s not going to be around! That’s part of the deal with Melody. He’ll be gone for three months.”
My breath caught, a black hollowness opening up inside me. “Is that what this is about for you? You’re going to miss Liam, so you’re looking for someone to fill the hole he’s leaving in your life?”
Parking his hands on both hips, Quinn faced me squarely. “No, dammit! My God, Steph. What I feel for you two is completely different. I love you both in totally different ways.”
I caught that he’d said he still loved me but let it pass. It was probably a slip of the tongue, and I was too distraught for endearments. I wasn’t the only one. Quinn was upset, and getting more so by the minute.
Distress turned to fury. My blood pressure ratcheted up. “Divorced parents get involved with people all the time! Several of my friends have been through it, and the kids learn to deal with it. I’m wondering if you’re the one having a hard time getting over our breakup. And you’re using Liam as a shield.”
I inhaled sharply as he stepped forward, his eyes blazing. Pure masculine fury and magnificent in every inch. “I am not hiding behind my son. God Steph, what do you want from me?”
Glaring, I marched forward to close the distance between us. “I want to matter to you. I want to be a part of Liam’s life. And yours.”
Both of us were breathing hard. Angry heat poured off him in waves. “I already told you I’d do that. I love you both.”
“You love me? Prove it.”
Quinn grabbed my shoulders, yanking me toward him. He crushed his mouth to mine, a deep, wrenching moan escaping from his throat. I surrendered, melting against him, running both hands through his hair as I plunged my tongue into his mouth. He encircled his arms around me, squeezing my ass with both hands as he ground against me. Our kiss went on and on. Nothing else mattered except that he was in my arms. Not our past, not our future.
Only now.
I wrapped my hands around his forearms, feeling the play of his muscles underneath. “I’ve always regretted how we ended. That we ended. At the time, I was so hurt, and getting past that seemed impossible. But looking back now, I can see how immature and judgmental I was. But those wounds are still there, Quinn. And you reopened them yesterday when you saw me with your son.”
“Both of us have regrets. How will we know whether we can overcome them if we don’t try?”
I broke away, moving to stand several feet away as my resolve built. “Here’s the thing, Quinn. I’m not interested in being some dirty secret in your life that you don’t want to tell anyone about—especially Liam. That’s how you made me feel yesterday.”
“I know. And I’d never be ashamed to show you off. You’re the most amazing woman in any room you enter. But I’m not sure you understand that Liam is a huge priority for me.”
I whirled around, irritation rising like bile. “Of course I understand that! Do you think I’m some heartless bitch who wants to see your son hurt? You’re exactly the kind of father I thought you’d be. I’ve only been around the two of you for a short period, but it’s obvious in his face he worships you. But I refuse to get more involved with you if you won’t let me into your life! Your whole life, Quinn.”
“That’s what I’m trying to do here!”
“By only seeing me when your son isn’t around? What kind of message does that send to him?”
Quinn raked a hand through his hair. “He’s not going to be around! That’s part of the deal with Melody. He’ll be gone for three months.”
My breath caught, a black hollowness opening up inside me. “Is that what this is about for you? You’re going to miss Liam, so you’re looking for someone to fill the hole he’s leaving in your life?”
Parking his hands on both hips, Quinn faced me squarely. “No, dammit! My God, Steph. What I feel for you two is completely different. I love you both in totally different ways.”
I caught that he’d said he still loved me but let it pass. It was probably a slip of the tongue, and I was too distraught for endearments. I wasn’t the only one. Quinn was upset, and getting more so by the minute.
Distress turned to fury. My blood pressure ratcheted up. “Divorced parents get involved with people all the time! Several of my friends have been through it, and the kids learn to deal with it. I’m wondering if you’re the one having a hard time getting over our breakup. And you’re using Liam as a shield.”
I inhaled sharply as he stepped forward, his eyes blazing. Pure masculine fury and magnificent in every inch. “I am not hiding behind my son. God Steph, what do you want from me?”
Glaring, I marched forward to close the distance between us. “I want to matter to you. I want to be a part of Liam’s life. And yours.”
Both of us were breathing hard. Angry heat poured off him in waves. “I already told you I’d do that. I love you both.”
“You love me? Prove it.”
Quinn grabbed my shoulders, yanking me toward him. He crushed his mouth to mine, a deep, wrenching moan escaping from his throat. I surrendered, melting against him, running both hands through his hair as I plunged my tongue into his mouth. He encircled his arms around me, squeezing my ass with both hands as he ground against me. Our kiss went on and on. Nothing else mattered except that he was in my arms. Not our past, not our future.
Only now.
Copyright2022 - Erin Brockus
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